"Thanks for your compliance."
That's what they say on these flights. Compliance. Like you aren't a paying customer, rather a potentially troublesome complainer waiting to happen. Wasn't flying once a gentleman's pursuit? Didn't they once treat passengers with courtesy, not curtness? Sure, you may have had to pay an arm and a leg to fly back in the day, but by god it kept the riff-raff out!
There are at least two toddlers and an infant on this plane, a Boeing 757. There is already crying happening. Not to be excessively snooty or anti-child, but I don't want to hear kissy noises, crying, or little feet running up and down the aisle of my plane. Not ever.
I ate some American McDonald's for a quick lunch BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU DO IN AMERICA. As the Romans do. Or something. I barely finished half of the mess. I'd rather not get fatter, especially when I've been losing weight lately. We'll see how well I stick to that once I'm eating red meat for every single meal. That's how my family rolls.
More crying baby. iPod is coming out for the rest of this leg.
The person next to me either didn't show or they didn't sell the seat. I've got a buffer. It's a relief.
Dude is saying "peek-a-boo" to that infant now. Louder than necessary. I'm irritable.
My heart feels strange after that McDonald's. I should probably start seeing a doctor. I guess I'm getting old.
I've got a wing-adjacent window seat. I'll be among the first to see the engines flare out if we have a catastrophic disaster. That sure would simplify things, wouldn't it? Blah. Let's get this over with.
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Oh no you didn't... (you had to know I'd respond...)
ReplyDeleteI used to be worried about people having to listen to my daughter on planes or other public spaces but then the following points made by another mom-friend gave me permission not to care:
-We were all once children and our parents took us places. If you can't stand it, it's probably karmatic payback.
-I don't want to listen to someone else's ipod blasting right next to me or have their newspaper drape into my personal space or listen to someone snore or watch them drool or have their girth spill into my seat or have them sneeze and cough all over me and my child or have to speak to some lonely person who uses plane seat neighbours as captive audiences to discuss their crappy lives or smell other people's body odor. All these annoyances far surpass an upset child (particularly because they are committed by adults who should know better) in my opinion but I still have to put up with them.
Air travel sucks, but since it's basically a modern miracle that it can happen and it gets me from a to b much faster, I put up with it.
Leave the babies alone, P.
Still love you,
B
I shouldn't be allowed to be around children. I tried to make my nephew think he was crazy tonight. He's five and I literally was trying to make him think he was insane. Its not the kids that have the problem, its me!
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